day 956: Selfishness

"Don't be selfish; don't live to make a good impression on others."

The first impression is a moment to manage. We all know how important a first impression can be and in business where time is precious and patience runs short, the first impression's importance is multiplied many times over. We can do our best to make the first impression our best in how we speak, hold ourselves, and yes, how we dress. Yet, it can't be completely controlled as long as there is another person involved. The person on the other side of the table or the handshake comes to that moment with their own set of preconceived notions, emotions and filters. It is nearly impossible for us to know what is in their mind or what they have already faced that day that is going to enhance or taint their impression of us. What we can do is put our best foot forward and ensure that we are doing our best to make a connection with them. If by nothing else, if we make those first moments together a time of listening closely and allowing the other person to talk about themselves for a bit so we can get a sense of the mood and their willingness to open up, then we have a better chance of doing well with them. I was listening to a very senior executive describe an interview she recently had where the person doing the interview never asked one question during their hour long session. She said that the interviewer would just throw out random thoughts, sometimes provocative and challenging, and then let those thoughts just sit there until she would pick up on them and continue the riff. As she left the interview she had no idea what impression she had made but she had a really good feel for what kind of person he was and had felt that she had been able to adapt to his style. I suspect because of this, she made a good first impression. So, we never know when we are going to be making a first impression, but let's remember, it is a moment to manage, be thoughtful around, and most importantly be sure that we put the other person first.

For those of us who are purposefully working to bring glory to God in our work and lives the first impression, and every ongoing impression, is even that much more significant. Paul gives us a tip in Philippians when he tells us that we not to live to make a good impression on others. He is right, if we were to totally focus and live just to make a good impression then we would spend all of our time thinking about ourselves, thus why he says in the beginning of the verse, "Don't be selfish". That said, we still must manage our impressions as we know others are always watching and those impressions whether the first, or ongoing, are critical in how others can or can't see Christ reflected through us. Take a moment and reflect on yesterday. What type of impression did you leave on others? Were there actions and words that if you could take them back you would? For me personally when I ask myself that question the answer is always yes, because I know that I can only get better. Today is the day to make your impressions better than yesterday, especially those first impressions that are there for you to begin today in the best and right way.

Reference: Philippians 2:3 (New Living Testament)