day 144: Honey, Please

Last week my cell phone rang while I was in a department store. It was a woman who I work with on a non-profit board and she was "fit to be tied" because someone else on the board was treading all over a project that she is trying to lead and get off the ground. She was upset and trying to figure out how to diffuse the situation but still get the point across. That same conversation, change the names and the reason, was happening at that time (and is probably happening right now) across any number of companies across the country and around the world. Who does what, who is in charge, who is taking the next steps and who is trying to one up the other person is a constant dialogue thread at work. As this person and I settled on the best way to talk to the other person to calm the situation and make everything as productive as possible we fell back on the axiom that honey always works the best and that she should be talking to the other person in a way that acknowledges that everyone has been heard and that their thoughts and feelings will be considered. If I had been faster on my Scripture feet I would have been able to have quoted Proverbs 15:1 for the situation at hand: "A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare". What a great lesson to hide deep within ourselves when faced with these moments that we feel we need to be sure and get our point across in response to something that is out of bounds, off alignment, or crosses a line with us. A gentle word of understanding, a soft response of recognition, or a calming set of words coming from us can suck the negative energy from the conversation and the room, leaving all of us able to to communicate more openly, positively and productively. One of these instances is hiding around the corner for you. It might be today that it flares. When it does, remember the words of Proverbs and see if you can find the gentle answer within you and add your own spoonful of honey to the situation.

Reference: Proverbs 15:1 (New Living Testament)